I intentionally wanted this as my 200th post. This is technically 201, sorry!
Huzzah! I have written over 200 posts on WordPress over a span of a few years. Though I quietly celebrated 100 posts, I think 200 is a bigger accomplishment. On the occasion, I want to reminisce back on the last 200 posts and give you folks the view on this side of the Internet.
Origins
When I started this blog, it was for a few reasons. During the time, I was a pretty angry person. Just pent up with anger that I just needed an outlet. I didn’t really have anyone to vent to; the only times I ever felt like I was myself and calm was when I was writing. Not just journal writing, but a medium where someone will read it and maybe people can share or chime in. I wouldn’t say my blog is a success story, but I can say I’m calmer because of it.
I tried vlogging a few times, all failures. For one thing, I had to edit them intensively. Devoting an hour of unpaid work for a few minutes was not feasible for me, not even now. That and also I find my voice and face pretty unattractive. Maybe some day, I will vlog.
So I decided to blog, choosing the host site was problematic since there were a lot of blogging site. For awhile a was milling about having it on Blogger. Just before I had this blog, I was still in high school if you can believe it. One of the classes had me create a Twitter, I never update the thing after I got out of the class. Microblogging like Twitter is not as appealing as a medium that doesn’t restrict you on the amount of content to can put out. Sure I can have parts to a tweet; but if you ever read my long posts, you will know this isn’t very scalable. Tumblr was pretty hip during the time, but it’s seemed very much of a popularity contest to get content features. I’m not funny or an adorable cat so I couldn’t really be sucked into that drama. WordPress seemed to be a good choice since the community was somewhat inspiring and the interface was and still is very understandable and not super user friendly. One thing I like is the fact I have control over a lot of things on my blog.
As I said, I was pretty angry so I thought to let it all loose. Every time I had something to say it would be a long rant. At the time, my free time was a warpath in video games. I was playing up to 8 hours a day, “hooked” would hardly describe it. You think it would make me violent or more angry but it helped me calm down a bit after a day of before the day starts.
“One Post a Week”
This was my mantra and usually still holds firm. At the beginning I feared I might burn out if I put out a blog post every day or every time I finished one. So I thought to release one every half week, but I still thought burn out was pretty short. So once a week sounded pretty reasonable; weekly content and I can think about each topic and prep a good list of topics to hit on before I publish it. Aside from this, it allows me to supplement with new content that might be relevant for the week. For those who have followed since post #1 would know sometimes I publish one or two more for the week. I sometimes I have a different topic I wanted to touch on before I forget it. But I try to stick to a schedule of one a week even though sometimes I might be early or late on a post date. I do this on my free time which at the moment I have plenty of; if I drop names, I drop it because I like it not because I’m not being paid for it. Yeah Allahweh, I’m talking to you; name dropped.
That ADHD!
I’m never up front about my mental condition since society has a monopoly on taboos. People don’t really know how it feels to be ADHD or try and play it up as “well, you’re just lazy” or “why can’t you sit still for 5 seconds?” It’s very tough to explain from my point of view if someone asks how it feels. The way I put it, it’s a good thing if you can control it or at least manage it and a bad thing if it’s slowing you down. In a way, it’s a gifted curse. I allows me to broad my horizons and learn things in general, but academic performance would vary. I may not hold many post-secondary qualifications, but I can study bits of it and get what it’s about. People will tell me it’s not right, not normal. To me, being right or normal is never the point of living. If it was, everyone would be perfect and boring. And if you know me, perfect isn’t normal. Perfect is an idea and not a way of life. Life is imperfect and in itself, is unique between everyone. In short, being imperfect makes you a more unique individual.
Randomly Yours
If I could somehow let you into my mind, you would see some crazy stuff and maybe hear some very random ideas. It’s not a hallucination, but it would be all the stuff I daydream and think of from a day to day basis. I always wanted to put it in perspective for those who don’t really know how it feel like you have a lot to say but no necessary outlet – or you just forget about it and when you remember, you say “Dang it!” So here I go to emulate in words of stuff in my mind.
I got to email this guy. But first, Chrome –> Youtube, Facebook, WordPress. I wonder if anyone still uses writes “Facebook” as “FaceBook”, I use to remember a few people who did that. Same with YouTube. Was WordPress use to be known as WordPress? Gotta watch this video, watching this video linked here. I wonder if there are any Facebook update. I wonder if those bloggers have anything new posted – tab up! Note to self: write blog post. I got ideas right? Well, probably come to me when it comes to me. Crap, I got to pack for that trip. Huh, the more I think about it my neighbourhood is pretty good to hide in the zombie apocalypse. Assuming each building houses an average family and most buildings are detached so they can’t jump and get me. Being a Canadian, so firearms are going to be hard to find. Unless someone on my street secret has a firearm or a police car happened to stop right there before the end of the world. Though it would be semi-likely to find a cop car within 4 blocks from me. If there isn’t a cop car, there are a couple school nearby. I could raid the janitorial closets for a shovel or something. Maybe fashion myself a spear with safety scissors. Hah! Most people would say large populated areas are pretty bad for a zombie apocalypse so the local malls are out of the question which sucks since there’s just a large gold mine of materials to loot if it came down to it. Probably for the best is to gather food and materials and go self-sustaining.The local supermarkets sell seeds so get a small wind turbine or something steam powered for an underground or backyard greenhouse and surplus power for anything interesting. There should be a game like that. Just a video game where you gather junk and craft it into barricades and stuff to survive a zombie apocalypse. There use to be a television reality series on Discovery, The Colony. If there was a video game, it should be closely to that. Huh, I remember there use to be a season 2 of that show; did they every make a third? Google it! Well, I spent a good 6 hours on YouTube and still nothing done today. I feel like playing video games.
Without reason or provocation, I would sometimes have some good ideas and sometimes my head feels like it’s riffing random thoughts and things I should do. I can’t stop myself aside from drowning my thoughts with music or just trying to hang on working on one task. Even with that, my mind can permeate through the noise. Whatever you want to call it, right or wrong, that is me and that makes me unique.
Going On, Going Strong
After 200 posts with almost 80 subscribers, I can say it’s fairly unexpected anyone would hear a lowly voice. Starting this blog had only one goal in mind, an outlet. I always come up with ideas and opinions that strike serendipitously and the forays into games which lead me to this very point where I am content with what I have. It’s small following, but no doubt I am very thankful I have this very opportunity to share to the world at large what I think about it and what I think about myself. I don’t expect to possess the best material on WordPress, but I do want to try and aim for the best material I can ever provide. As for number 200, lets celebrate it by bringing back my old Twitter account? Yeah, why not!
Thanks for those of you following, liking, and subscribing; here’s to 200 more posts!
nawkcire 
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