nawkcire

Games, Tech and Blogging…I can't guarantee in that order.

Tag Archives: right

Hurting Inside

One thing’s constant in my life, trouble. I’m always being told I’m wrong. It hurts a lot when people who you think are friends turn against you when you know what happened was wrong.

Something happened I wish no one would ever have to go through and those who have been there, they know what I’m talking about. I understand why the silence is painful, how loneliness can be the only escape. Even when you lose control, you just have whatever you have to keep you tuned in. It’s a rough time when you think everyone is against you. I want to say that no matter what happens, let it out to someone. Tell someone what has happened to you. It’s painful to hurt yourself and it hurts to keep it inside. Even worse when you can’t feel anything when there should be something.

Perhaps in time I’ll tell you what has happened to me but all I can say is it’s better to tell someone. Even if it’s a friend or someone you thought you can trust, it’s better to tell someone than let it be a secret.

I’m so flooded of anger and hate and drained of emotions, I’ll let this post like this and hope this helps someone. I’ve done so much but I want to do nothing but make it better than just trouble.

Life, War, and Ethics (Humanity in a post)

In this wondrous era of technological innovation, we live in a time where old is over and new is never the same. Or is it? There has been strives in things we would consider just and unjust. Much of these changes are put forth to better a whole. We live in the present, the pinnacle of society to what was once archaic and what will it aspire to become. Though archaic, they are the foundations of society that we can never remove unless we remove what we built upon it. I’m talking about the morals and ethics we all hold and all have towards each other. The thoughts contained directing what we do and must not do. Probably one of the few things we intrinsically need to continue and without it, disintegration would follow. We live to survive, to find purpose, to find love, to do whatever we want to do; this is our dream our goals in life. But then from there we would have question how far you would go to make sure that happens. It does sound selfish at first but it is a question of how far you would go to stick towards that goal.

Life

As a society, we have one sole goal; prosper. Many people go beyond this one word add their twist. Whatever obsessions, we all have this individual and social goal. We spend lifetimes to perfect it and even extend life to search for those answer we yet to understand or seek. Ancestral days have passed us many generations. Those people who stepped out and did the greatest acts of prosperity and still remain nameless. They harnessed nature to improve health by cooking and boiling. Invented tools like knives and clothes to keep providing shelter and a method in further utilizing the world around them. Little they knew they began a new path towards a technologically involved future. They never spoke words per se, but communicated in gestures and later one conveyed in cave paintings. After a vast and great migration we all heard from science teachers, they began something a bit unusual for nomads; settling down and building a life without worrying day by day about resources. They still kept some of the old ways to ensure a backdoor, just some way to up and go in case the path they picked doesn’t fair well. They began simple terraforming that later grew on massive scales to feed millions, then billions. This to us is called agriculture. Necessity was a driving force for all the happenings in this anonymous time we know little about except from the artifacts they left. Following food sources and water to maintain well being. Building tools because they needed things more specific for the job like cutting and slicing. As they traveled to strange lands, they needed ways to adapt quickly to the cold and the environment. That is what they did and did it for them and those they were associated.

Though settling down does sound pretty dull. They didn’t give up on crossing the river or climbing the mountain. They tried hard and explored what they have and what they could do to better their situation. “If I want to climb that mountain, I should settle in and figure this one out.” They continued building tools and discovering resources that would help them on the way to overcome challenges. From flint to copper, caves and overhang of trees to huts and houses. They did what they did to survive and move on. Later on as small groups bound together build larger and larger communities, their resources and infrastructure scaled with them. Building villages, cities, castles, and roads connecting in between. Alongside, languages resembling what English is now. Besides the verbal, visual communication in forms of characters forming an alphabet making letters, laws, literature possible. This documented their achievements of the time from birthdays, baptisms, deaths and dangers that came to them. Art even flourished to depict the best of times and the worst of times. The parties, the rituals, the sacrifices they endured.

The creativity passed on to bring forth new ways of thinking and doing. New societies formed, crumbled and forgotten until the modern era. They rediscovered this past and began to learn the lessons of those they will never know. Instilling a new way of thinking of self in society, largest we know today as democracy and currency which was introduced before the common era. This is the revolution of humanity; we learn, we forget, we rediscover.

War

Conflict has followed us after every newfound knowledge. Ever since the first homo sapiens had a disagreement which led to a murder, we always want retribution. We build methods to unleash our vengence with; starting with fists to sharpened tools, then came arrows and slingshots. This had much of a downfall which was the will to survive. So strong, we created countermeasures to protect us from the things we’ve created. First building shelter securing our resources, next was to secure our most valued vessels; our bodies. We built armour to protect us from bludgeoning, then from slicing with chainmail. Chainmail in fact was the best against swords that it was augmented with it’s brother, the suit of armour. Then when gunpowder was invented, no one was forever safe. Projectiles with this propellant could pierce armour of the day and even maiming and killing without much need to being face to face. So powerful, the world took notice and began to funnel money to this substance to use against their enemies. When faced with insurmountable odds, we once again adapted the technology to do more than light up the skies. Faster loading rifles, concealable hand cannons which we now call pistols and automatic repeating weaponry soon followed in 700 years.

When small balls weren’t enough, we found ways to make the balls better, rifling and redesigning for performance. And when bullets weren’t enough to stop those enemies,; we upped the ante to big balls and big guns of the cannon variety. When it couldn’t get any worse with machine guns and cannons, we built missiles; also could be consider one large bullet with a killing potential of an army. We didn’t stop there, we built nuclear weapons; massive to kill millions in a blink of an eye and destroy the ecosystem at a moments notice.

Only 30-40 years in to the end of the last nuclear test, we redesigned warfare to now be more precise as possible or destructive in the wrong hands. Not only killing lives but causing chaos with only a few key strokes away. Scary thought, isn’t it? Why hasn’t this happened yet?

Ethics

Though crude as this contrast is, it proves a point about us now and what of the things to come. We all should step back from what we think and do to evaluate the current situation; whether it is self or others, the question should be “how can this be better?” And doing better is always moving toward prosperity. However wherever the better goes, the worse follows. Since humanity is all in a cycle of great things and it’s negative outcomes. Building things we think would do a lot of great things and yet much of it snatched away to be used for something sinister.

Recent example of this ying and yang is the Internet and it’s users versus the industrial complex prior to it’s development. Where freedom to share worldwide is wrestling against monitoring and restricting access to a vast array of computer networks. The old and the new, the many and the few, the company and the citizens; it is not of a war of brutality, but of neutrality. If steps are taken to close off this network, it leaves a foothold no matter how vague or specific it may be for the users. The ethics is whether we should reserve a place to protect the Internet. But from what and whom? The people who share ideas and information? The people copying and reproducing content? If yes to both, then I agree we should shutdown the copyright industry. What a twist eh? Let me explain. The lawyers on behalf of the publishing industry producing works of many people of many works. They all share ideas on how to make a video game or a movie. And even now, the theatres are stuck in a rut reproducing the same content over and over again. Sure with a slight change, but still that is splitting hairs like downloading said movie in 1080p and recorded on a camcorder. In a way, it is indeed a conflict of whether it is the right thing to do to restrict access. When we do, the walls will be built and likely will never come down. As a captain once said “The line must be drawn here! This far, no further.”

Having a sense of ethics is a critical part of the human experience. To align ourselves to what we ourselves consider right and wrong and create our own conclusions. It is a gateway value toward respect and moral thinking, the thing that tells us the necessary and unnecessary. Ethics is this framework to create a society, we made it so because it is necessary. In our society these ethics are deep rooted to preservation of life and making absolute choices in crises. It is imperative to assist in medical efforts in order to preserve the life of someone with a heart attack and render aid when possible and able. When someone hands you a gun and threatens you to kill someone or they kill you, you factor those variable of why you should and should not comply to this coercion. That to me is ethics, that is what drives me and should drive society.