nawkcire

Games, Tech and Blogging…I can't guarantee in that order.

Tag Archives: opinions

Need To Make It Rain

The past winter, I bought 500 business cards. With my name and a web address to my 500px account. In hindsight, sometimes impulse purchases isn’t the best way to get business cards.

When I first bought this batch was because I saw the 50% off deal on Vistaprint. Great deal at the time considering it’s 500 cards. I made a very simplistic card, white lettering on black – no designs and a straightforward style.

When they arrived, they come in boxes of 250. Well right now I’ve managed to give out about  20-30 of the 500. Since the last purchase, the place has been having the 50% business card sales all the time. So looking back on it, I could’ve spent more time designing a card to be more appealing.

Speaking of business, I was invited to a business seminar. It was a mixed bag of thoughts. Firstly, the entire  seminar was highly focused on getting people into a business to sell products. Something I’ve had some recent experience with, however it just sounded very remotely a bit of a scheme to brainwash people. When I was accepted the invitation, I thought “I could give away at least a hundred of these bad boys.” I arrived with 50 and only gave two and one to a friend of a friend. It’s unfortunate but these folks seemed a bit high brow and disillusioned. I think I’ve tried networking at a seminar and now I just have to dial in where to distribute and market myself.

I do feel semi-serious about starting a photography job. However in a city of millions, it’s tough to compete with someone well established. However I’m not in it in win it all, I just want to at least make it to be independent. Just taking it one job at a time.

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Local Resturants

After a week of eating at small dining establishments, I’ve learned a bit about my area.

In terms of variety and styles there is not much of I like or enjoy and when there is “variety” it’s only by presentation. It kind of bums me out that no matter where I go I find an Asian eatery or a cafe. The only thing that really changes is the scene that occupies inside the restaurant but not much else in terms of the taste.

Sadly wandering around the city I found the same monotonous cafe. As much as I like the hipster vibes, it lacks in a community feel.  I only say that because I want to drop my business card on bulletin boards. I still like a humbling place with the smell of roasted beans wafting, but it feels a bit empty without interesting or interactive wall decor.

I think for now, I can say my week long experiment to see this city in it’s culinary glory is successful but I wish I could’ve seen more. I might keep trying to visit more but for now, I’ll get close to what I know.

People are terrible.

Before I say anything, I’m going to say this. I’m a lurker at Imgur. I’ve never made an account on there but I like to browse through some of the content over there. Sometimes it keep things light hearted and some things I see there can make you feel passionate about things. As a hobbyist photographer and I don’t know why, I saw this and my jimmies were rustled.

For those who like to play it safe, let me tell you what you will see in that link. It’s a long list of pictures of people taking photos, seems innocent. However each image has those people abusing the environment. You would see a person standing atop a ledge, one harassing a large bird, and a person shaking a cherry blossom. Then the last one which had me wound up; a man wielding a camera taking a close up of a bird which looks like it’s being choked.

I was shocked and I’m happy I haven’t seen people do that yet. However the reminders are there when taking a photo, never jeopardize your safety and never harm your surroundings. Some people don’t necessarily think of their safety until it happens to them. It’s one thing to stand high and tall to get that majestic shot but once you lose an arm and a leg, not having a good picture is the least of your problems. After seeing the gallery I decided to see if there was a list of selfie deaths. Surprisingly, there is a list! Even worse is the list a long. A lot of folks doing, not much thinking. And I thought I was a bit impulsive.

Then there is the wildlife cruelty, I just hope there is a special dark place for people like that. Whether it’s animal or plant, I do think as a photographer I should be observing and not influencing. There is something about studio photography where you are capturing a subject but when you’re in the big wide world, you are just there to take what may come. If you’re using the world as your backdrop, then you should be responsible to minimize your impact to the environment. Don’t tread on a flower garden or shake a tree because it suits you.

Anyways, I will be doing a bit more photography as the days grow longer and sunnier.

Good Luck Next Time

I know I haven’t been staggering away from my traditional weekly blog posts, I’ve been caught up with work recently. A lot of out and about work and with the recent weather, I’ve been taking my camera out in the warm sunny days.

However I’ve been holding back writing a post about relationships because I should really be the last person to give relationship advice. I take that back, I should be the bottom ten people you should ask. In the past month or two, everyone is either getting in trouble with relationships or wanting to leave a relationship. As the nice single male I am, I always suck myself into these conversations with “Tell me about it.”

I want to be the helping hand and open ear for someone to feel good. A lot of people I’ve talked to drink heavily after a relationship; not going to lie if I had the money, I would’ve done the same. Usually drinking alone and suffering is the same, nothing is solved and it will still hurt at the end. The  weird thing is I find one within the pair who was seeking more than just a physical relationship and that’s what gets me.

I do believe in this century, there are variability in the definition of love but the still hardest to grasp I’ve seen and witness is romantic love. I’ve had closely had a romantic relationship and compared to people I’ve meet seemed to want the same, the love of another person. I almost want to tell them a daring truth that what they seek is not a physical embodiment of love but a love which can only be received in kind and care. Even then I don’t think they would reciprocate in the sense to understand romantic love but to rationalize their needs in that context. Romantic love is not a date on the calendar or a price tag, it’s the devotion and the willingness to weather hardships of not your own but others. Still as you read this, some will say it’s easy or asking how but that is the difficulty of romantic love and how I think it’s the greatest of loves. If done right it can reciprocate with bounty and if done incorrectly can hurt the most toughest of souls.

I would want that romantic love but it is just an idea most people see as unobtainable. From my point of view even if I don’t ever find that romantic love, I will still look for it and her.

This. Phone. Company.

A couple weeks ago while I was writing the last blog post, I kept getting calls throughout the week. At first I understand these people are being paid to call me to sell me the company I subscribe to for my telecom service. However after the third phone call in a week, I’m starting to get fed up.

Of course it makes sense companies call you by their means to be friendly to let you know you’re due up to renew your service after a contract (if you have one). As important is to keep repeat business going to make money off their customers. However I’ve been called a few more times than usual within the week. Prior to this, I would receive the occasional text about local discounts on entertainment and venues. Those customers similar to me might know this company.

It sounds to me this company is desperate. Their constant calls in the evening seem to be more hostile than informative. It’s really getting on my nerves that around 8:10 in the evening, a lady calls me to tell me about their “new fast internet service” they would like to  offer to me as a “loyal customer”. There are a bunch of problems.

Starting with the speed of about 25 mbps, it’s great speed – incredible speed, even. However at $50 a month, I am still paying for my internet. No matter how affordable it may be, my current living arrangement has given me access to the Internet. My income isn’t enough to pay more bills considering I would pay double for communications. So if my phone company is reading this, know this – please stop calling me. I’m set for the time being.

Thanks for “considering”.

Gaming Achievements

Don’t know about you guys out there, but I feel a bit off every time Steam tells me I’ve  completed an achievement. I always open up the in-game overlay to see what I did to deserve a pop-up like that. Usually achievements fall under after completing part of a the game or the whole, then there are achievements which are very mundane. Some games are sensible with the achievements but there are are some that can be sinning against the purpose of achievements.

To me, a sensible achievements is story completions. It makes sense especially if you created a game that’s hours long. Another sensible one is when you collect an amount of objects. Makes sense to put a good achievement on a tedious task. If the game has some complex stuff in it, it’s even cooler if there is an achievement for it like saving someone from explosion damage or being able to react to a certain way. However there are a few achievements I don’t want to see even though I might have achieved these on my own account and accord.

I like a good achievements for a repetitive task. However a repetitive achievement for a repetitive task is overboard. As much as I can kill 100 bots, I don’t want to kill a million bots for an achievement. At that point, you’re just playing to kill and not necessarily enjoying the killing bots. This goes the same with FPS games which does the same thing but with a different weapon. I’ve played games which want the player to kill  a thousand with one weapon and a thousand with another. It’s a nice way to push players to try these guns and grenades, but there is no point aside from forcing players to play with weapons the developer is lazy to balance or the player does not which to play with for the duration.

Mystery achievements, as much as they are surprising they sometimes don’t provide any contextual information for their completions. Whether in the icon or description, they can be fairly vague. Most games I’ve encountered have been mysterious but able to convey a point where they want us to do. For most of the time, some of you developers have to give the player some sort of clue.

Then there are games I’m not even sure they’re really games anymore with over a hundred achievements. I have a game in my library which has over 500 achievements. Most of the are hidden since Steam has the courtesy to hide the massive list. I don’t think I have the patience for 500 achievements! Early on I had Team Fortress 2 as the only game with achievements. Looking at it now, it has a lot of achievements that look intense. I did achieve the “Pyromancer” achievements but it was an undertaking. To spent years on a game to complete the list of achievements is as agonizing as spending years in an institution. Which gets me into downloadable content achievements!

This generation of gamers seem to support DLC to games. Nothing wrong with that since some of them are like expansion packs of the past. Most of them would hardly count as an expansion pack, but I digress. I don’t like achievements related to DLC’s, especially on Steam since the service clumps all the game’s achievements. Which means you can’t “perfect” a game on Steam without buying their DLC content. Which sort of supports the argument of games are incomplete until all the DLC’s are released which sounds a cash grab.

Achievements should be an enhancement and not the objective for enjoying the game. I honestly hope more games can do less in achievements.

22 Push Ups

Going around the internet at the moment (and a few of you already seen on Facebook or other medias) is some a bit odd. Not as odd as the ALS ice bucket challenge a few years back, but it’s a bit practical. It’s gotten popular to the point where my coworkers have drafted me into this charity drive.

In the past I’ve tried things to change up my regimen in hopes something sticks. Definitively I’ve tried to go video game free for a few weeks and a few days on my blog a long time ago. Now my friends have challenged me to complete 22 push ups per day for 22 days. Between my readers and I, I’m starting to hit a point where I’m not very frequent.

Here’s how I would describe the challenge for those who haven’t heard about it. Upon nominated in a video in someone’s push ups, you have a day to complete your first set of 22 push ups. After that, the intent is to complete 22 push ups every day for 22 days. Every single day, you are to nominate a person to do the push up challenge.

Aside from my inconsistency, my work has been disrupting the push ups. Last week I’ve been out of town and away from an internet connection. Being away means I have to pre-record or post-record another day. I feel pre-recording is a bit cheating the system but at the same time I know I’ll be a day or two behind. At the moment of this blog post, I have a few days behind my push ups because I’ve been sleeping through the days. It’s not a good thing since I have a few things to do during the day. Still have to visit the dry cleaners and get ready for another Saturday work day.

In the end, I just hope I still can finish my push ups. I’m just reaching my first week into this and I’m definitely going to need the entire month to finish.

Discovery

The best part about being young is you have a fresh view of the world. You can always change and make it to what you want rather than following in someone’s footsteps.

I’m growing out of the youthful age but I still feel inside me as youthful but in a different way. As a kid, I couldn’t self express the way I wanted to and it seems now I’m catching up with listening to music and taking up photography. Even if you go back 5 years, I went creating a YouTube channel and this blog which is still an evolving piece of my life! I am still finding the self I am comfortable with and not the self people want to see.

We’re all still young, whether you are at the start or to the very end; there is something to find new and different. A part of living is to live in the shell you grew in, but as I’ve learned through this year discovering something for yourself is something beyond the shell.

Always find something new and discover it for yourself, you might find something what will transform you.

Homeward Bound

As I grew up I felt less and less at home in the house as I grew up. Even if it was inherited, I would still feel I don’t belong here. After decades of being in this house and the neighbourhood, it’s familiar but it’s not what I would call “home”.

Something aches inside me to want a place I can my own. A place I can call own, a place I belong. There is just a place I want to be; I don’t know where, whether it’s metaphysical or realistic but it’s there gnawing inside and I want to find it. This is what salmon feel when they swim upstream, you just know you have to go but you don’t know where. Even if it kills me, I want to know where this place is and if it’s even there.

I’ve laid in fields with fields above. In the empty void, in the silence, there has been that urge; the urge to go home or find it. Even when I’m the place I sleep and work, the calling is way too strong to ignore.

What exactly am I looking for, what is this urge? Will I even find it?

Giving up.

It’s tough, I have to admit, it’s tough to seek happiness and peace in life when everything antagonize negative thoughts. Much recently, it has been occurring a lot. There would be moments I feel so good and myself, then I would just feel tired and wanting to give up.

Ever since I got this job in the big wide world, I’ve learned a few things to help resist those thoughts. It’s a rough go at first to push myself to go back to the positive space in my mind. With a bit of help from my workplace, I’ve been able to do it. It might not help for you, but give some of these a shot. First, I do a breathing exercise. A slow inhale, about 4 seconds; I try to focus myself until I have no thoughts in my head or until I feel calmer. Sometimes it takes over a minute to feel the calm I need to move on.  The whole point is to have focus for the next part. Next I try to think about neutral and happy things. These can be petting animals, good moments I felt in my life, sleeping well after a long days work; stuff like these however limit it to one thing at time. I try to not push myself to spend more than a a few seconds because the moment would disappear. I keep doing this until I have collected myself to self affirm and validate myself as a person. Who I am, what I want in life, what I achieved, what will I want get done in this moment; positive “I can”, “I will”, “I shall” statements, out loud (I usually whisper it to myself) or in my head space to fill the neutral or positive void I’ve created. If it doesn’t work out, I focus on the breathing exercises; four seconds inhale and four seconds exhale.

It’s a slow progress to find the peace I need but from the couple years I’ve been at my job, I’ve had added one more thing on top. And here it is, whether you say it out loud is up to you:

There is no giving up, only surrender.

To surrender is to stop fighting.

To fight to find a meaning, a purpose, a cause.

There is more to in fighting than surrender.

DO NOT SURRENDER.