Happy new years, readers! As much as I want to be jovial, I feel anchored in 2015 and dragging myself into 2016. Dragging because I’m getting older and I don’t want to grow up.
Ripe in this moment in my life, I went from having a broken heart and a broken dream to just hanging on a bit of hope alone. From one bad thing to another in the past few years,they seem now stepping stones. Coming into 2016, I feel my time is running out. I fear in 40 tears time, I will have a big regret of never spending my time wisely while I was young. The last decade whipped by me so 20 years can easily be a blur.
I still have time to set things in motion for the next few years. My stubborn hope is all that keeps me from giving up. Hope in something I have yet found. 2015 was the year of recovery, perhaps 2016 will be the year of discovery; maybe rediscovery?
It’s kind of hard to think of an embarrassing moment in my life worth sharing; either they’re too personal or way too embarrassing to share. Everyone’s threshold for embarrassment is different. However I do have something to share while we’re on the topic of embarrassment.
Most commonly I get embarrassed when in conversation with someone and the topic leads into territory where I cannot necessarily contribute to the conversation. I do like the occasional banter but there are times when someone mouths off into a zone where I feel uncomfortable to add, in the end I have no way of backing up or continue forward. Recently it has happened well more than a few times and I feel like I have little to no information to provide so I do my best to provide a generic and neutral answer.
Conversations as great as they are, sometimes turns into more of an intellectual sword fight than small talk. As much as I like both, I don’t really like one turning into the other. My brain is not a wikipedia, nor a reddit. My brain is my own and I choose what I need when I need it. So I am sorry to those strangers I’ve encountered I could’ve give you a straight answer. Sometimes I can’t really give you an opinion because I don’t know or I can’t tell you because of other reasons, that is how life works and I hope it doesn’t offend you.
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