November 26, 2017
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I’ve been kind of out of it. Been busy working this weekend, I’m stuck inside while I’m sick. All I can do is sit at home and play video games and pass out. I have been massively fatigued once I wake up, almost sleep has no effect on me.
The most difficult part I’ve learned is getting sick really sucks. I’ve had to trade in work for bed rest and I’m losing by the day. However in the past week while I am sick, I did get a few things done. My camera has seen some uses, but been playing a huge amount of video games though. Not much for recording but I have been just absorbed into looking at sales and not stressing about anything.
I’m not quite sure what my next throwaway hobby is, but I feel like I should start exploring for another.
November 17, 2017
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Well, I tried writing those fictional letters for about 9 weeks. I must admit I’m a bit burnt out. On the bright side looking back, I think I haven’t lost my touch in creative writing.
I’m going back to writing as per usual, blogging my own life is preferable than a fake one (No matter I wish it was real.) Since I started it, I’ve been heavily busy with a second job. Surprisingly both jobs are fairly steady but I have trouble to find free time since I get really fatigued after a day of work.
Looking ahead, I’m trying to start a small business. I’ll let you know how it turns out. At the moment, I want to pay off all the money I put into buying my DSLR and it may or may not succeed the way I would like it. At least I could have the potential to make back all the money I’ve lost.
November 4, 2017
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It’s only been a few days out here, I couldn’t help to write to you. Being so far away, I wish I could hold you in my arms.
When I first arrive in this small town, the locals mentioned something of a small waterfall in the woods. I scrambled all the camera stuff I could pick up and went out. I probably trekked a few hours along a path and through the low brush to encounter this clearing. Sweetheart, I wish you could have seen the roaring falls landing in the pool of water. Idyllic for photos, but all I could think about was swimming with you. I probably sat on top of the waterfall overlooking the area. I saw everything. The tired town as it settled in to slumber. The greenery of every park and tree all the way to the horizon. The sparkling lake almost untouched by man. The red-orange sky as the sun slipped away.
It’s only as fragment to what I’ve seen here. Yet I wish I could convey it in more than just photos with you.
October 28, 2017
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I am so tired after today. Spending the day shopping with you was something I wouldn’t think would be fun. But trotting around the mall with you was a joy. I could never understand anyone could spend an entire day to try clothes. I guess if you’re really into trying out outfits, I can’t help watching you step out with every dress and t-shirt you want to buy.
When I first told you I was madly in love, I wouldn’t have guessed you felt the same but today like every other you showed me the mutual affections. Smiling at you strut every piece new clothing I can’t help to feel so fortunate to be with such a playful belle. In my dorky smiles, I guess you found something worthy about me. Something so dorky to warrant you to pull me in the dressing room and kiss the smile off my face. Sorry to disappoint you but I don’t think kissing would get rid of the exuding joy I feel when we’re together.
I don’t think we can ever feel any less wherever we go. Even at the mall, you could raise my spirits to enjoy a day solely for you.
October 21, 2017
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Already it’s autumn and you always have impeccable timing to drag me out of the house. I thought it was just another day with you but I you just made me fall more into you.
Darling, every day waking by your side in your bed could never describe the coursing love through my veins. I knew when I first slip into your sunday dress, I knew it would be likely a a nice afternoon stroll. Albeit it was a cold day, we went on the boat to the island. The day warmed up slightly but I’m convinced you love long walks as long as there are blue skies.
I can still remember we sat by the lake on one end and playfully walked to the beach the other end. It felt like every place we stopped was tailored to us. Every beam of sunshine painted the pastel canvas of your gorgeous face.
I could never ask any more from a perfect – perhaps my blisters to disappear.
October 14, 2017
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We both know the first time we’ve met. Somewhere in the world with a smirk and a smile. You standing there with an honest blush on your face. I never really told you when I first fell in love with you.
It was one of our dates where I took you to the cinema; as simple as it started, it was just the best way to remember. We stay in the dark and watched the drama unfold. Through it, I felt your hand drift into mine. Your head softly lean on my broad shoulders. I looked over to find your hand holding mine. I was still unsure if you would end up like every woman in my life, upped and gone. In the darkness, you reach out and squeezed almost telling me there is someone there for me. I squeeze back, hope you understand what that meant to me.
Though after the movie, I was regretting we watched the last show. I remember taking the train with you. The entire way to your stop, you just held me and I could only hold you back. In our embrace, the world didn’t seem to matter. Time didn’t even seem to matter. As we walked home in the street light, you asked me to come in; of course, I could never say no to you (except playfully). As I close the door behind the stone path leading to your house, you kissed me and pulled me up stairs. Dragging me towards your bed, you made your intentions known. I told you I was tired. You held me down on your bed and kissed softly, you laid me down and cuddled into my arms. I didn’t resist but insisted.
It was enough to know you wanted to be loved. I do; I love you.
October 7, 2017
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Thanks for letting me take photos of you. You did kind of did take me every time we went out. You’re such a dork for pulling out your phone during dinner and taking photos. I especially remembering you taking one while I had a bunch of noodles hanging out of my mouth.
Though it took us forever to finish today, I liked every moment. Watching every pose, seeing the smile your always put on; you lift me up to this plane of happiness every time we’re together. As I hit the shutter button, I felt like I was in a trance just seeing the moments we had spent and the dreams I still think about for us. When I put down my camera and kissed you on your bed, I really wanted to mean it. Wanted all those dreams transferred from lip to lip so you can understand how I feel about you.
But I would take a kiss any day.
September 30, 2017
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Here’s the thing about taking a photo for me. I love going to somewhere familiar, yet different. An oxymoron, right? The thing is once I find something I want, I do what I can to make it perfect.
I spend so much to change it, alter it, transform it into something I would proud of; sorry sweetheart, when it’s just right I have the urge to make it better. When we first met, I felt like my life can be better. I was a scrambled mess until I starting to pick up a few hobbies then landing to this one, photography – my therapy. Even while I edit my photos with you sleeping next to me, I feel I have everything I could ask for. It’s odd how one little thing, one person, can bring so much joy.
There were time you would surprise me in ways that baffle me. The craziest thing was when you called me over and when you opened the door, I felt my lung empty in half a gasp. You dyed your hair, not only that but you also cut it down where the end curl to almost meet your neck. Yes, at first I was pretty mad you went from your natural blonde to a deep purple. Without warning, I was mildly upset but I hid it; I’ll admit it now. After that day, it slowly grew on me.
You’ve made your point. There are a few things that even when I think I have it right, things get better even if I’m not involved. Perhaps the right moment can be the one I don’t necessarily control but if we’re both willing, we can capture it together.
September 23, 2017
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Thanks for coming over. We do talk about a lot about everything. I rarely turned into that person but I was glad you were there.
The stress of the world recently has oppressed everything. With work being all it is the past week, I felt like I wanted to curl up and cried. As I laid with a tear rolling down my cheek, I saw your message lighting up my phone. In the darkest room, I replied back and you promptly told me to come over.
Even if it was hours ago, I still remember your open arms wrapped warmly around me. Laying in your bed, we just talked, held hands and just grew in that bed. The tears subsided and we just lay there together with our music filling the silence. As my emotions calmed and my head cleared, I turn over to your nestled on my shoulder. I couldn’t help but to kiss your forehead. You looked up to me and met me halfway as we leaned in to kiss each other.
Under the dim light and the soft mutual touch, it felt right and I felt you need to know how much I wanted to be with you – even though we were tired.
September 16, 2017
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While I’m writing this, I feel I’m stumbling through my words in this letter but I’ll try.
I can remember the island. It was sunny, invitingly warm. It was only a few times I have been here but I’ve been taking pictures the entire day. I was composing a shot of the pier when I was rudely bumped. As I looked over my shoulder and my slung backpack, there you were. You had this puppy look as you apologized to this complete stranger. Your little film camera was pointed at your friend, framed with the trees and the skyline; you stop midway to your relentless sorry. “-oh hey…how have you been?” or something like that, I was already lost in your surprised smile. It was strange to meet a familiar face again since were first hit it off. From how you sound, I knew you were thinking of me as well. Just two awkward people staring into each other’s eyes, then interrupted by your friend who you introduced. You were trying so hard to remain cool, but I knew I was stuttering away while caught by your gorgeous eyes.
I don’t know how it happened but we ended up the day taking photos together. On such a beautiful day, I was surprised I got a lot of photos. Boarding the boat and watching the sunset with you, I remember you walked up close to me and hugged me. It was interesting, inviting but it was kind of forward. At that moment I reminded myself, “get her number, right now.” As I reached in my pocket for my phone, I felt your hand grab for my phone and already adding your number down. As we walked from the terminal to the street, I felt terrible to part ways.
I knew I would call you later that night.