nawkcire

Games, Tech and Blogging…I can't guarantee in that order.

Life/games–comparatively how things work


I like how those fine designers in the backrooms of every office of Any Game Inc. seems to want to simplify everything. Making every mundane task an epic quest for something big and beautiful. It’s time we put them side by side and see how we stack up between each world.

Work

Life – Get up brush teeth, dress, go to work for 8 hours.

Games – Log on, pick character, grind for loot.

Food

Life – Buy or pick up ingredients, prep work (chop, preheat oven etc.), put everything inside and wait until done.

Games – Farm nodes, go to craft screen, Metal + Wood + Magic = Cheeseburger Of Filling (or buy potions.)

Greeting

Life – “Hey”

Games – “sup”

Screwing up

Life – “It will not happen again, sorry.”

Games – “It was my little brother.”

Injuries

Life – Bandage and rest injury to avoid infection.

Games – Potions.

Serious Injuries

Life – Hospital.

Games – Potions.

Death

Life – Funeral, pay 6 figure sum of money for burial.

Games – Respawn, pay percentage of Experience/Loot/Money.

Person versus Person

Life – Get robbed and lose a lot of stuff (on you or in your house.)…or die, which could be bad

Games – Gank or be ganked. Go for the low levels for easy wins.

Learning new skills

Life – School for 25 years or so. There goes your youth.

Games – Kill mobs, kill mobs, level up, kill mobs, kill mobs, kill mobs, level up, new skill.

Parties

Life – may contain booze, broads, and food

Games – may contain loot, lots of experience, in a dungeon with many dudes

Making of a party

Life – “Having a party this Friday. It’s got girls, beer, and lots of pizza. Wanna join?”

Games – Go to populated area and say “LFM level 30 mage Creep Old Guy’s Basement of Darkness”

Insults

Life – “Screw you, you don’t know better.”

Games – “lol nub u suck roflcopter no skill” or say the n word or f word in a sentence about 6 times in a row.

Suicide

Life – Jump off bridge.

Games – Go AFK in a dungeon alone.

War

Life – Train for it with an army and likely die.

Games – Run around, kill stuff, get more stuff. Spawn on death.

Sex

Life – Long, hard and rough.

Games – Non-applicable.

Gender equality

Life – “Sexual harassment”

Games – “Boobs or gtfo”

Games

Life – Use money, get games from game store or download.

Games – Minigames

Life

Life – 1

Games – “100 coins gives you 1 life.”

 

As you can tell, life is pretty nerfed.

Know any more life/games? Feel free to comment.

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One response to “Life/games–comparatively how things work

  1. Linear Fix January 10, 2012 at 7:14 pm

    What? What do you mean I can’t get a new life after I collect 1 dollar in real life?!

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